Weekends.

So.

Got extremely sick of studying and took a weekend off. Youth Alive was on Friday and I jump-danced the Year 12 stress away. Only at the back of my mind came the annoyingly familiar little whisperings that set me on edge and made me stupidly self-conscious. Of course none of it showed. But I couldn't shrug off the awful feeling that everyone had matured, grown into confident, beautiful people while I was stuck with the same old me who had just gotten better at pretending.

But no. I will not be patronised. Inferiority complexes are stupid. I am who I am. Be it sickeningly sweet or snappy, insecure or arrogant, friendly or cold, nonchalant or overly sensitive or all at the same time.

Oh Erica, when will you ever learn that it's not possible to please everybody? That you won't always be liked by everyone nor do you need to be.

Spent Saturday night home alone. There's something liberating of having the house to yourself. You sing, dance, play music, watch movies, cook dinner, laugh for no reason, spin, jump, skip. No one's watching. No need to feign confidence, to pretend you care or don't care, no one to please. Sweet freedom.

Anyhow, here's to Monday. With Monday came a strange lightness. A welcomed lightness. Perhaps I have finally moved past those teenage angsty moments and emerged with a new self-assurance.

Lol. I'll bet it's temporary. But then everything's temporary. And I'm good with that.

Forever learning,
Me.

Psh. Who needs people anyway? :P