This is from my memory. Do not quote me on this. It might not be exactly what was said. It's a recount of one of our many odd conversations when walking from our lockers to Parer Street.
Isabel: You're as innocent as a tissue.
Me: Pfffsh. Tissues aren't innocent. They get blown on. (thinking of when people sneeze)
...
Me: AOJFSOPFJOPDGIPODGJPDJGPAOSDKFF. POOF. OMGSH. I did not mean it that way.
-mixture of laughter and disbelief between the two of us-
Monday, August 27, 2012
A Bunch of Happenings
Alrighty,
An update on the past month or so because I've been lazy/busy/forgetful. They aren't in any particular order.
Bio camp! At Kangaroobie. It was Jessie, Vicky
I did the 40 hour famine again! This time I did speech AND furniture. It just so happened that they were having a free dessert bar a Epic Super Central on that very Friday. So, I bribed Isabel and Sumin with the free food to come as my translators. (Idk. I just really wanted them to come. O.o) I'm hoping they didn't have too unbearable a time. I don't have much of an idea of what they thought, seeing as I couldn't ask on the night... And it's not like they're going to say it was horrible in case it would offend me.
>>Dear Isabel, as frank and honest and blunt as you are, you do actually consider other people's feelings. Sorry to burst your bubble, but you aren't as mean/evil as you think you are. I think. ><
Mm. Church on Saturday was okay. Dong silently accompanied me on the floor. He did the same as me. And then after, Gareth kept on poking me. I was actually this close to exploding and telling him to STOP. It wasn't annoying. More liiike... Frustrating because I couldn't say anything. Haha.
Sunday was Melb Uni Open Day. Dong, Ben, Kendrick, Nicole, Colin, Phillip, Ryan, Chris, Kevin, Martyn all rocked up at the train station. Come to think of it, we were actually a pretty big group. O.o I gained nothing from the day. LOL. Except a free water bottle, some brochures and a bag. We went ALL the way to Docklands for lunch. I don't even know why... It was only when I got home that I came closer to discovering what I might do with myself. Arts/Law or Medicine. Man, I can't see myself as anything these days. Future me, do somehow time travel back to me and tell me what I'm meant to do with my life.
Well, that's all I have time for folks. Oh wow, that was a weird ending phrase.
Cool, bye.
Erica
Beauty & the Beast
OH MY GOODNESS.
I haven't made a musical post. D: I am quite a sorry excuse for a blogger. No readers, completely out-of-date posts, no photos or music. Oh well. It's for my personal future reference anyway.
So, Beauty & the Beast! I actually made many more new friends this time compared to last. I miss my CanCan girl costume and my villager one too. The pink frills made me feel like a princess. xP It was actually so happy that Isabel and Viv came for the first performance on Thursday. Idk. Performing for people you know in the audience, seeing them afterwards and gushing about the musical makes it wayy more enjoyable. Vicky came on Friday. Oh oh and Ben, Jun Yi, Chai and Josh came too! It was a rather pleasant surprise. :) And Tan family came on Saturday. Tess loved it. :D
Like last year, I went to the afterparty and then stayed over at Crystal's. And unless musical afterparties tend to be more dud-y than normal parties, parties aren't actually all that they're cut out to be... Dancing and food are the better parts. The conversations you have are quite meaningless with no real point to them. Or maybe I just wasn't talking to the right people..
Anywho I shall summarize. Um. Guy called Christen showing off his card tricks while the girls 'Oooh-ed' and 'Ah-ed' (ratio of girl to boy was like 15 to 1, maybe that's why it was so un-fun); Alice getting typsy and trying to get James and Kieran to play the pocky game and kiss (we think we're mature at Year 11, but really, we're just bigger kids finding different forms of amusement); Meher getting more than a little drunk; Me stealing sips of other people's drinks to try and find one that I didn't not like (not very successful, cruisers were the only non-foul tasting alcoholic drink). It was interesting, I guess, observing teenage behaviour. LOL.
Digging to find my inner party girl, she must be in here somewhere. ><
Erica
I haven't made a musical post. D: I am quite a sorry excuse for a blogger. No readers, completely out-of-date posts, no photos or music. Oh well. It's for my personal future reference anyway.
So, Beauty & the Beast! I actually made many more new friends this time compared to last. I miss my CanCan girl costume and my villager one too. The pink frills made me feel like a princess. xP It was actually so happy that Isabel and Viv came for the first performance on Thursday. Idk. Performing for people you know in the audience, seeing them afterwards and gushing about the musical makes it wayy more enjoyable. Vicky came on Friday. Oh oh and Ben, Jun Yi, Chai and Josh came too! It was a rather pleasant surprise. :) And Tan family came on Saturday. Tess loved it. :D
Like last year, I went to the afterparty and then stayed over at Crystal's. And unless musical afterparties tend to be more dud-y than normal parties, parties aren't actually all that they're cut out to be... Dancing and food are the better parts. The conversations you have are quite meaningless with no real point to them. Or maybe I just wasn't talking to the right people..
Anywho I shall summarize. Um. Guy called Christen showing off his card tricks while the girls 'Oooh-ed' and 'Ah-ed' (ratio of girl to boy was like 15 to 1, maybe that's why it was so un-fun); Alice getting typsy and trying to get James and Kieran to play the pocky game and kiss (we think we're mature at Year 11, but really, we're just bigger kids finding different forms of amusement); Meher getting more than a little drunk; Me stealing sips of other people's drinks to try and find one that I didn't not like (not very successful, cruisers were the only non-foul tasting alcoholic drink). It was interesting, I guess, observing teenage behaviour. LOL.
Digging to find my inner party girl, she must be in here somewhere. ><
Erica
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Recap
Okay.
I just realized how my not-blogging for that massive chunk of time has affected my future. I mean, I am depriving myself of future laughs when I look back and see how FUNNY and immature I used to be. My future, old, wrinkly self with a deteriorating memory needs all these posts to either reminisce her childhood or wonder when in the world something like that happened. Yes, I am blogging for you future Erica Tan.
So this is me committing. ish.
The Tan family flew to Sydney the very day holidays began, at 4 a.m. on Saturday morning. When we got there, we plonked ourselves in a motorhome/caravan thingie. It was an... interesting experience. We were to drive up to some town, stay for the night, then to Armidale, then Lake Macqueirie and back to Sydney Airport. In spite of the cold nights, getting lost in the middle of nowhere, occasional arguments and extremely bumpy rides, it was an overall quite fun.
Then there was Viv's birthday. We went go-karting. Exhilarating.We felt uber cool racing around the track with our helmets. I do love my friends.
I also went to RMIT Community Justice Day. Not as great and interactive as last year's Health Science Day. It involved listening to people promote different university courses.. Oh well, Dong and I agreed that we went for the free pizza. :) We were split into groups, I figured I'd have an okay chance of getting someone I knew because Viv was going too. But nooo, I wasn't. BUT surprise surprise, Crystal showed up. As well as Lucy, another PLC girl. HAH. Trust PLC to make half the population of kids who go to workshops like this.
No. I don't think I got any closer to figuring out what I want to do.
Ericarrrr. Heh.
I just realized how my not-blogging for that massive chunk of time has affected my future. I mean, I am depriving myself of future laughs when I look back and see how FUNNY and immature I used to be. My future, old, wrinkly self with a deteriorating memory needs all these posts to either reminisce her childhood or wonder when in the world something like that happened. Yes, I am blogging for you future Erica Tan.
The Tan family flew to Sydney the very day holidays began, at 4 a.m. on Saturday morning. When we got there, we plonked ourselves in a motorhome/caravan thingie. It was an... interesting experience. We were to drive up to some town, stay for the night, then to Armidale, then Lake Macqueirie and back to Sydney Airport. In spite of the cold nights, getting lost in the middle of nowhere, occasional arguments and extremely bumpy rides, it was an overall quite fun.
Then there was Viv's birthday. We went go-karting. Exhilarating.We felt uber cool racing around the track with our helmets. I do love my friends.
I also went to RMIT Community Justice Day. Not as great and interactive as last year's Health Science Day. It involved listening to people promote different university courses.. Oh well, Dong and I agreed that we went for the free pizza. :) We were split into groups, I figured I'd have an okay chance of getting someone I knew because Viv was going too. But nooo, I wasn't. BUT surprise surprise, Crystal showed up. As well as Lucy, another PLC girl. HAH. Trust PLC to make half the population of kids who go to workshops like this.
No. I don't think I got any closer to figuring out what I want to do.
Ericarrrr. Heh.
Musings of the mind
I miss my childhood: the ignorant bliss, the innocence, the two-dimensional me.
I know I've had my fair share of complaining about my 'lost innocence', but I genuinely feel a sense of loss. Sure, I used to be described as 'sensitive', the negative adjective, but that's better than this. I guess got sick of it. Sick of being the 'sensitive' one who burst into tears or hid behind her mother's skirts at the first sign of pain. So I learned, I learned to harden my heart and mind to numbness. It's a barrier to getting hurt. One doesn't feel pain if one doesn't feel at all. It's a defence mechanism.
Put on a tough face, act like it's fine. Pretend like you don't see what you do because in all likelihood, it is only in your mind. It's a skill, to be able to fabricate your own reality. Then again, all are born with an imagination, the ability to make-believe. Child's play.
So I don't see why it's not working. Insecurities are forever creeping in, threatening to destroy the tower I've built. A tower of feigned confidence.
But for now, the castle holds its ground. It's like a switch that automatically switches on when people are around. Reflex. But like all reactions, it's temporary. When people leave, silence follows, and the weight returns. It never left, you just pretended for that period of time, so others wouldn't see the strain beneath the smile. Then again, there was no strain, was there? In the moment? Because after years of practice, that's how good you can get at playing the part.
My eyelids are actually closing on me. This post probably makes no sense whatsoever. It's just patches of thought. Nothing. I'm sure I'll be fine by tomorrow. After a night's slumber. Besides, these unread words will drift into nothingness anyway, too insignificant to remain in even the author's memory.
Me.
I know I've had my fair share of complaining about my 'lost innocence', but I genuinely feel a sense of loss. Sure, I used to be described as 'sensitive', the negative adjective, but that's better than this. I guess got sick of it. Sick of being the 'sensitive' one who burst into tears or hid behind her mother's skirts at the first sign of pain. So I learned, I learned to harden my heart and mind to numbness. It's a barrier to getting hurt. One doesn't feel pain if one doesn't feel at all. It's a defence mechanism.
Put on a tough face, act like it's fine. Pretend like you don't see what you do because in all likelihood, it is only in your mind. It's a skill, to be able to fabricate your own reality. Then again, all are born with an imagination, the ability to make-believe. Child's play.
So I don't see why it's not working. Insecurities are forever creeping in, threatening to destroy the tower I've built. A tower of feigned confidence.
But for now, the castle holds its ground. It's like a switch that automatically switches on when people are around. Reflex. But like all reactions, it's temporary. When people leave, silence follows, and the weight returns. It never left, you just pretended for that period of time, so others wouldn't see the strain beneath the smile. Then again, there was no strain, was there? In the moment? Because after years of practice, that's how good you can get at playing the part.
My eyelids are actually closing on me. This post probably makes no sense whatsoever. It's just patches of thought. Nothing. I'm sure I'll be fine by tomorrow. After a night's slumber. Besides, these unread words will drift into nothingness anyway, too insignificant to remain in even the author's memory.
Me.
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